Stealing an idea from various players, but most specifically Glinda! That is, I've seen people doing things to keep track of all threads. Considering that four of my six characters have been here for over a year, these lists are obviously not going to be complete, but I can at least make an effort to keep track of threads from now on. So.

( Let the organization begin! )

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.
Woody Allen (1935 - )

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.
Douglas Adams

If we don't change direction soon, we'll end up where we're going.
Professor Irwin Corey (1914 - )

My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music.
Vladimir Nabokov (1899 - 1977)

First, addressing Marvin's age. As mentioned in my app, I'm going with several months old. Marvin was stolen with the spaceship Heart of Gold when it was brand new, and everything in the ship has GPP (Genuine People Personalities). Marvin states that he was a prototype GpP, meaning he was probably built before the ship, but not by much. I'm taking him around the end of the first book/beginning of the second book, so he's definitely fairly new.

Second! I would like to take this opportunity to encourage everyone to GO OUT OF THEIR WAY to abuse Marvin. Maybe you'd like to rip his arm off and try to convince people it's a rifle so you can threaten them. Make him do the stupidest, most pointless tasks. It is canon for everyone around him to abuse him in pretty much any way possible; he gets dropped into a sun, an army of killer robots steal his leg, the crew repeatedly leaves him to sit in one place for thousands of years on end. They even make Marvin face down a tank armed only with his intellect.

Basically? Feel free to do everything you can to fuck Marvin over. It's really going to be hard to beat the abuse he goes through canonically and where other characters can become unplayable because of emo caused by abuse, Marvin basically has one emotional state, so I'm not really worried.

Next on the agenda is Marvin's job. He's going to be the backup loudspeaker, so hopefully this means I won't be horning in on fun with the actual loudspeaker. I was thinking that basically Marvin would occassionally Marvin would make his typical announcements, but more importantly, if anyone wants to use Marvin to make an announcement, feel free. Make him do prank announcements, have him say ridiculous things, etc. I'm probably also going to use this job as an excuse to have him sign up to help announce for the next camp tournament and other such things.

Another thing! If any machine/computer/robot interfaces with Marvin, they are going to immediately have Marvin's perspective of the universe dumped on them, which generally has the effect of causing the poor thing that hooked up to Marvin immediately do anything from start smoking and give up on life...to commiting suicide. Be warned! (Hi Artoo, Tachikoma! ♥)

Last order of business, because I probably forgot a few things!

Marvin regarded it with cold loathing while his logic circuits chattered with disgust and tinkered with the concept of directing physical violence against it. Further circuits cut in saying, Why bother? What's the point? Nothing is worth getting involved in. Furhter circuits amesed themselves by analyzing the molecular components of the door, and of the humanoids' brain cells. For a quick encore they measured the level of hydrogen emissions in the surrounding cubc parsec of space and then shut down again in boredom. A spasm of despair shook the robot's body as he turned.

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"I know," said Marvin.

Ford called out from the controls he was still fighting a losing battle with.

"Stay out of this, Marvin," he said. "This is organism talk."

"It's printed in the Earthman's brainwave patterns," continued Marvin, "but I don't suppose you'll be very interested in knowing that."

"You mean," said Arthur, "you mean you can see into my mind?"

"Yes," said Marvin.

Marvin, as should be implied by how he keeps talking about having a brain the size of a planet, treads the line of being an information godmoder. He is supposed to be able to read people's minds. Now...this is tricky. I don't think I'm going to consider if people can shield their minds or anything like that, because Marvin isn't being psychic or using magic; this is a machine literally scanning your mind, and this is something that he can do with a tiny fraction of his computing power. It actually doesn't even matter if your character started concentrating on something in an active effort to throw the reading off, because the entire reason Marvin even brings the ability up in the first place is because Arthur Dent is supposed to have the question to the answer of Life, the Universe, and Everything Else locked away in his brain. It's unconscious knowledge; Arthur himself doesn't know the answer, just that he's supposed to have it.

However! The ability only comes up once in a series of five books. When asked why he didn't mention anything about being able to read minds before, Marvin answers with a simple "you didn't ask." And frankly, Marvin literally couldn't care less about your secrets and your thoughts, so I actually wouldn't be surprised if this never even comes up in camp. But I figured it would be safest to give a heads-up and make the following proposal:

If you want Marvin to bring something from your character's mind up for god knows what reason, talk to me. Otherwise, if there's some reason I'd like Marvin to read your character's mind, I will find a way to ask you OOCly on a case-to-case basis. If you think there's any problems with this arrangement, or maybe even have a better idea, talk to me. Basically, I don't want to step on any toes, but I also don't want to ignore a part of my character. I'm hoping this is a good middle ground.

...Ah, yes! And if anyone wants to talk to me about problems in my app, I'd love to talk to you about it. Comment here, PM me on IRC, email me, wait until the next cfud_concrit post...whatever you want to do. I want to head of any problems with Marvin's voice before it has a chance to get ingrained.

Character: Marvin
Series: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Character Age: A couple of months, at most.
Job Idea: Backup Loudspeaker
Canon: The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation defines a robot as "Your Plastic Pal Who's Fun To Be With." Ironically, when the company decided to introduce "Genuine People Personalities" as features in their products, they built the prototype, Marvin, who is neither plastic nor fun to be with. Best described as a "sulking machine," Marvin is a super-intelligent manically depressed robot who trudges around making a big show of just how much effort it takes to move. The robot is not difficult to understand; Marvin openly detests existence and complains endlessly in a very loud fashion about how everyone hates and abuses him, which usually results in everyone hating and abusing him all while trying to politely deny it. Explaining his view of the Universe repeatedly causes spaceships to commit suicide, entire armies of killer robots to loll about sobbing dramatically, a bridge to collapse weeping and other such minor disasters.

Sample Post: Wretched place, isn't it? Sparkles, a chocolate well, some woman who probably offed her own old man—now there's a lucky bastard, if you ask me. Just my luck she'd want a bunch of people to sit and listen to her complain about how depressed the whole thing makes her. As if that's not bad enough, the entire bloody planet seems to have got stupid enough to forget that it's been demolished to make room for a hyperspace bypass. And to top it all off the Director decides her camp's got to be based in a swamp. Swamps! Don't even talk about them.

Then there are the campers. They think they've got problems. Some of them are still mourning the loss of that Bloody Mary spring—doesn't that just take the cake? Just a load of vodka and tomato juice, rotten stuff really. Can't bear the stuff. I wouldn't drink it if my circuits depended on it. Not that I could drink it if I wanted to. Thank you the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation for never stopping to think maybe I'd like a liver to abuse with disgusting drinks. Not that it'd make me happy, but they could at least be a little considerate.

And those poor fools keep telling me I have to save with one of you "moogles" before I can talk to the football players. Isn't like I want to talk to the football players. I can't stand sports, but there's not much else to do is there? 'Course, I'm not getting anywhere with that either. Every time I talk to a moogle it grabs its head, cries "oh no!" and pop! Dead as dead can be. One after another, like little lemmings. "Oh no," pop! "Oh no," pop! Exactly like you're doing now.

. . . What a stupid little creature that was. Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and I have to suffer the indignity of mucking about in a swamp watching moogles blow themselves up. Swamps! Don't even talk about them.

But I know what you're all thinking. Won't the bloody robot just get on with his stupid little job and stop bothering us? Why won't he just make his silly little announcement and go so we can get on with our pointless, hormonal lives? Fine, if you really want it done that badly, I'll get on with it. But you won't like it.

ATTENTION CAMPERS: I'M FEELING VERY DEPRESSED. THAT IS ALL.

I suppose you all want to shoot the messenger now. I told you that you wouldn't like it.

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Voted in at 90.5%.